Happiness is a Field of Colour

Happiness in a Field of Colours; Oil on canvas, 30.5 x 121.9, Framed, $2500

This painting was started back in October ’23.  It was the first time I had picked up my paints since I had finished a commissioned piece at the start of the year.  

I’ve realised, when I throw myself into a new business venture… my paints are the first thing I set aside.

In fact, I’ve gone years at a time without picking up a paintbrush or pencil. (And yet when I do pull my paints back out, it’s like coming back home to myself).

I started this painting at a time when I was in deep contemplation about the direction of a new-ish business venture in wine. I knew in my heart that I was feeling at odds with our direction and had told my business partner that I really needed to reflect on my (& our) next steps.

As part of my reflection and contemplative time, I threw myself back into my lapsed meditation practice and picked up my brushes again.

I instantly feel like myself again. Sitting early mornings on the mat for my meditations instantly brings me back to myself and the wisdom that is in my heart. And picking up my brushes instantly brings back a sense of flow and joy.

I know that I am a better mom, wife, friend to myself, friend to my friends; when I take my time each morning to connect my heart, connect to my breath, get out of my head, and allow the inner wisdom to expand. And it’s when I’m quiet that the voice inside gets louder. ‘Paint, Ann Marie’ … I’ve heard it so many times; have countless vision boards with me painting… and yet I have continued to ignore this call of my heart.

Not this time.

This time, I decided to listen.

I decided to trust.

And I came clean with my business partner. 

Solely focusing on wine was not where my heart was.  My heart wanted to paint, to play, to meditate and do yoga.  

In that moment, I realised so clearly that there is no one but me making decisions for how I live my life. And it was time to live the life my heart was calling me to live.

So this painting represents to me the transition from the old me that did not prioritise my heart, did not prioritise what brings me joy and did not prioritise my wants and needs over others. To the new me. The Ann Marie that prioritises what her heart is calling her towards, to prioritise joy and to leaning into the discomfort of sharing this transition publicly in hopes that it touches others 🫣

To you it might look just like a simple field of colours. But for me, Happiness is a Field of the Colours is this realisation that is leading me into both calling myself an artist, as well as running retreats and workshops to help others connect to what their heart is calling them to do. 

Life is simply too short to be living any other way, but true to yourself.

No voice should reside in your head that overrules what you know to be true for yourselves. So for me, happiness is picking up the paintbrush or in this case, paintbrush and palette knife to wholeheartedly step into the person I want to be moving forward. An artist, a writer and a joyful-facilitator.

Happiness is indeed a Field of Colour.